Motherhood Is The Best Thing To Happen To My Business!

Starting A Business As A Mother

I don't know about you, but as a high-achieving goal oriented person, motherhood is the best thing to happen to me in my business.

As an emotion coach and hypnotherapist, who also has my own private practice, I am constantly immersed in self love work, and helping my clients slow down and receive more good things into their daily lives.

But my primary focus when I started my business a few years ago was actually very different. At that time, I saw that I had to be really clear at the front end of entrepreneurship about 1.) what my boundaries were going to be, and 2.) what my limitations were going to be.

Learning From Bad Experiences When I Started My Business

Based on past experience, I already knew it would be really important for me to be able to rest and to not have to go at the pace that I was going when I was an employee. As an employee, I had to meet all these productivity targets that often had me exhausted and demotivated. And frankly it made me wonder if there was something wrong with me. Not. Good.

I also was required to show up to all the meetings, of which there were definitely too many, and I had to deal with highly dysfunctional workplace dynamics that made me feel gas lit on a fairly regular basis.

Needless to say, I knew that I wanted it to be really different when I started my private practice. I wanted to be the boss to myself that I would have wanted in some of the most stressful past roles at work. Thankfully for me, I had actually had an amazing boss early on in my professional career (shout out to Dr Crawford👋🏿), so I didn’t have to start from a completely blank canvas when it came to imagining an ideal boss.

Considering My Own Needs For The First Time

I was able to thoughtfully consider how to be a great boss to myself so that I could be an employee in my business who is happy with the way that my “organization” is treating me. I chose to be really

clear about what I needed and honest about my physical limitations in terms of my schedule.

I decided that I would not be able to be a therapist who would be available all the time, even if that’s what potential clients wanted from me. I really worried about this boundary, convinced at first that it would hold me back from growing or working with the people I really wanted to serve. But I quickly made the choice that I would simply have to say No to any expectations that went beyond my energy.

By the way, it always helps to let in input from people you love and trust when setting up boundaries. My husband helped me uphold my boundaries in regards to work, reminding me of my sneaky scarcity mindset when I felt tempted to shift my own priorities to please someone else.

Ultimately, I simply couldn’t say yes to everything. Saying “yes” to one thing meant I had to say “no” to something else. And after years of working towards other people’s goals, I wanted to keep my desires and goals firmly in the space of “Yes!”

Embodying My Role As A Conscious Mother

So how has motherhood changed my journey as a business owner? Well , in short, it is one of my biggest assets in reining in my ambitions and remaining psychologically healthy.

If I had not become a mom when I did, I am certain I would have just been doing all the things, all the time, and burning myself out. I still sometimes try to do that because I'm such a highly driven person! That's just how I'm built. But by placing the holistic well-being of my children at the forefront, everything else, including my expectations of my business and the scope of my ambitions and my goals, were all cut down to the right size.

Having the motivation to focus only on what was actually essential to the health of my business was so incredibly helpful. This focus allowed me to easily zero in on what I most wanted to achieve. This way I wasn’t just achieving for achieving's sake, which is a trap that my personality type can often fall into (can anyone relate??). Being a conscious mother helps me to keep checking in and keep centering the needs of myself and my family. I am more clear that I can't do all the things and then also be there for my kids. Being snappy and irritable is about all I can muster when I’m exhausted. Not much fun for two little guys who want to play all day till the sun comes down!

Intentional Rest As A Mother

I have learned and am learning to manage my energy in a really mindful way. Not just for their benefit, but also for mine. I'm having to take better care of myself as a mother, as opposed to just going till I drop. With a toddler and a preschooler, I can’t rely on recovering from the demands of the week over the weekend. Parents reading this know- the weekends just aren’t the weekends anymore!

I’m curious to know- what did you used to do before you had kids? When I was single without kids, I would- go to a yoga class… walk to the farmers market…get some takeout and eat a really good meal while it was hot…sleep for a couple hours…and then maybe go out with some friends that night.

Okay, so that's definitely not my life now and that's okay! I actually really like my life now with my small family. It just comes with less sleep:/

So I am much more intentional about resting, because it can't just sort of happen by accident. This practice not only makes me better at being responsible for myself as a human, it also makes me much more conscious of what my sons need, too. They might want to do all the things (yep, taking after their mom, of course), but “Hey baby we're gonna need to take a break. You need a nap so you can rest and be ready to play again later.” I can communicate that to my son because I know I have to tell myself that same thing all the time!

I have learned to be more mindful and intentional as a business owner, and as someone who helps other people as a profession, because I'm living it too. I'm living out how to make choices where I'm actually taking the time to consider my own needs and stay attuned to my body and how I'm feeling. So now, I can catch it pretty quickly when other people are not staying in touch with themselves, and tell them “I've done that before. Let me help you!”

In Conclusion: Assess Your Limitations And Be Intentional With Your Boundaries!

I invite you to consider how the limitations that you currently have as a mom could serve you in your role in your business or your organization. You may be getting way less sleep, and not have an abundance of free time, but perhaps you are growing in becoming much more intentional and effective in the time that you do have because of those limitations. Keep in mind how you want to set up your structures to protect your time and energy. This way you can view your unique limitations as assets to be embraced, rather than burdens that you come to resent. So how is motherhood an asset for you?

I know for me, I wouldn’t have gotten this far without it!


Ready to start showing up as a much happier and more fulfilled mother?

Than be sure to check out my course offering SELF LOVE SKILLS- it has all the tools you need, and none of the ones you don't to access your new steady state of calm!

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